Stop the cry from this hell on earth!

We can help to end it.
.......................................

Solute! A just judgement Judging the Code

A judge

with

a sense of humor & a code of honor.

Viictory for Dan Brown.

小 爺 來 也

新生小毛頭

☆☆☆☆☆

黃 小 爺 說

"小爺我要收媽抖【model 】酬勞啦。"

詳 情 看 這 裡

● ● ● ● ●

Better late than never - NOT

A LITTLE TOO LITTLE,

A LITTLE TOO LATE!

越描越黑 不做不錯 越做越錯

【妙文轉載】恐怖份子 versus 女人

1. 一個可以談條件、一個不可以。
2. 恐怖份子明確告訴你要什麼，女人總是要你猜她們要什麼。
3. 恐怖份子會跟你談判，而你不能跟女人談判。
4. 恐怖份子會殺害人質，但是女人只會綁架人質一輩子。
5. 遇到恐怖份子只有死路一條。遇到女人會活在十八層地獄。 [生不如死]
6. 恐怖份子用別人命來談條件，女人用自己命來談條件。
7. 跟恐怖份子談判，贖金可能越談越少。跟女人談判，花的錢通常越談越多。
8. 與恐怖份子談判過程中可以找警察來抓他們，可是和女人談判通常是她們找警察來抓你。
9. 恐怖份子把褲襪套在頭上，女人把褲襪戴在腳上。
10. 恐怖份子不一定是女人，但女人一定是恐怖份子。

Magical wonder

A MAGIC MAN & A WONDER BOY

Gee, no wonder

Snow on board.

Here comes the snow job!

都 是 先 生 All Doctors

就有兩種行業的人，都得具備一股傻勁。
Two jobs for dummies.

一是老師，另一是醫生，兩者都是先生。
One teachers, one physicians; both doctors.

老師什麼木頭都得教，累死也沒人同情。
Teachers teach any logs, no one cares if tired to death.

醫生什麼病者都得治，癱死更沒人同情。
Physicians treat any sicklings, no one cares if exhausted to death.

我看出，這兩種行業都不是人活幹的。
I can see, these two jobs are not for human consumption.

我很懶，絕對不會想走這兩條不歸路。
I am lazy, will never go on these two roads of no return.


﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖﹖

繼 續 喋 喋

Smile or frown
含 笑 或 蹙 眉

Laugh or pout
輕 笑 或 含 怨

Lips curve up or down
嘴 唇 彎 上 或 下

Eyes dry or flood
眼 乾 旱 或 淹 水

Ears open or shut
耳 動 聽 或 掩 閉

Tongue wags or stops
舌 搖 晃 或 靜 止

Hands open or close
雙 手 張 開 或 握 緊

Legs firm or wobbly
雙 腿 穩 立 或 危 顫

Heart sings or curses
心 吟 唱 或 吐 咒

Life dances or spins . . .Should I keep babbling or quit now?
生 命 曼 舞 或 急 旋 。 。 。我 該 繼 續 喋 喋 或 停 止 了 ﹖

Calculus for Dummies

What an oxymoron.

Maybe there needs to be a Cheating for Dummies to get through Calculus.

Illegal Made legal

Why don't we just start with those illegal beings that

1. came over for at least 20 years
2. have kids over 18 years of age that were born in the US
3. have worked in the US all along the years
4. Not on any goverment freeload programs
5. pay taxes
6. no criminal records
7. no fraud records

Just start with saving the family units first.
...................................................................

誰快來解救雪貓的中文

雪貓的原版說法：

"if you are a serious photographer, you will love the feeling of sharing your photos with people all over the world, and hear what they think about your photo. "

"如果你對攝影很認真，那你會喜歡這種和全世界分享的感覺，以及聽到別人對你照片的想法"

這明明就是什麼翻譯的很濫的說明書啊啊啊啊啊，誰快來解救我的中文啊。

【後記】好像大家都搞錯我意思了，我不是想"翻譯"那幾句英文，而是想原意按照那幾句英文，以中文方式寫好這幾句話，而不是使用翻譯機得來的中文 。

人氣旺的雪貓，得到很多迴響，多話的我就留言如下：
..........................................................................................................................
How about this? 你可安裝免費使用。

有些人愛拍照愛現，最好全世界人都來看他照片，而且一定要大聲誇他一誇。

Posted by: Ｙ.R. at April 14, 2006 07:52 PM
................................................................................................
這個更好玩：

如果你愛拍照，你會愛死跟全世界人分享照片，還高興得到免費意見哩。

我喜歡這一個版本，不過還是不像貓話。

Posted by: Y. R. at April 14, 2006 08:39 PM
.............................................................................................
我又想到一個更簡單的了。

你愛拍照，也愛跟全世界分享作品。更愛聽得回應。

這個版本字最少，所以最省事。但仍然不像貓語。

Posted by: Y. R. at April 15, 2006 03:04 AM
..............................................................................................
這是我會用的不辣版本。因為我人懶，用最少的字。

攝 得 影 來 全 世 界 分 享，
聽 得 迴 響 來 衷 心 喜 悅。

Posted by: Y. R. at April 15, 2006 03:10 AM
...........................................................................................
上面寫的不夠工整，這個比較好：

攝 得 影 來 全 世 界 分 享，
聽 得 音 回 盡 衷 心 喜 悅。

Posted by: 不辣 Y.R. at April 15, 2006 04:56 AM
...........................................................................................

汝好攝影，必分享環宇候教，樂乎。

Posted by: 不辣 Y.R. at April 15, 2006 01:04 PM
..........................................................................................
啊，睡了一覺，又想到更簡的：

＊真愛照＊
攝＊＊＊環
影＊＊＊宇
汝＊＊＊樂
好＊＊＊迴
享＊＊＊響

Posted by: 不辣 Y.R. at April 15, 2006 07:36 PM
......................................................................................
喵 回應：

YR: 真是太感謝感動你的腦力了，連睡覺還絞盡腦汁幫我解決困難，不過的確給我好主意哩。甘溫啦!!!

＊

Oh Smile, so glad you are back!

• 
  
• I lost track of you for a while,
• Smile.
• 
  
• You were no where to be found.
• You were sorely missed.
• 
  
• Oh
• I am so glad to see you,
• Smile.
• 
  
• Now here you are found.
• Don't ever leave me again.
• 
  
• 
  
My dear, sweet
• Smile :)

................................................................................

A word to cry on---such a tearful

Dacryocystorhinostomy

Da-cry-o-cys-to-rhi-nos-to-my

胡 彈

Hu's running into Bush--->

Hush! Let human rights sleep.

對 胡 彈 琴 。

胡 錦 濤 【Hu1 Jin4 tao1】

乎 盡 掏

天 下 盡 握 此 兩 人 手 中

﹖

........................................

What's wrong

Secretary of Defense - Donald Rumsfeld

大頭國師－當懦。亂死活了

Who? He's the head of DOD. (As long as he's not HOA - headless on arrival.)

Shoot! Dragging men down with him?

Why is the bush still behind him?

God mom to dry mom

God Mother 教母 －＞ 乾媽 －＞ Dry Mother

What is a patient

A patient is someone who has to be patient

with getting well
with the idotic insurance companies
with the insensitive med people
with the demanding pain

Do not say to a patient
Just be patient

Do not compare nor compete with a patient.
Simply be compassionate.

Do not get impatient with a patient
Unless you want to turn a home patient into an inpatient

Be patient
All my fellow patients.

For they know not
What is a patient.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Don't kid a child.

I may like to kid,

But never call me a kid.

And

I may act like a child,

But shame on you for calling me

CHILDISH.

So get it you all?

............................................................................................

100 YEARS LATER OF THE SAN FRANCISCO BIG EARTHQUAKE

Pulling my strings

Enron: 安隆 ?

Enron: 安 隆

安 隆－＞ On loan

Enron should sound like 安 恩 卵

Yeah right, not. 一點也不安恩卵

安 恩 卵 was not safe for your nest egg at all.

Fight. Attack.

i.
fight.
i fight.
i fight hard with my words.
precise to win the rights

i.
attack.
i attack.
i attack smart with my voice.
loud to beat the injustices.

...............................................

Rude or Mean

Some people are rude.
Some people are mean.

Rude people can be mean, but not always.
Mean people on the other hand are rude always .

There are rude people that do not mean it,
And there are mean people that do mean it.

There are mean drunks that want to escape pain.
There are mean sicklings that want to do the same.

Are you so lucky that there is no need to be rude nor mean.
Everything is for you sane and just the hanppy same.

..............................................................................................................

Pope on Easter Sunday

Easter Sunday in Vatican

2006 c Jammy Yen

Cry Not Cry

• I try.
• I cry.
• I try to cry.
• I try not to cry.
• I tried.
• I cried.

Ｗhat is BoF ?

?

Who can tell me what BoF means?

Blogs of Formosa? Bloggers on Formosa?

Bloggers of Fun? Blogging for Fun?

Blogs of the Future on Formosa

The answer, would never have guessed:

What the ...Bird Flu?

? ? ?

?

One more knot for the high technology

What?

I can SEE what you say!

See no evil. Hear no evil.

英文姓名妙妙中譯

作曲家：

• 喬治‧韓德爾 (George Handel, 1685-1759)

• 羅伯特‧食穀慢 （Robert Schumann, 1810-1856)

• 汝得威格‧范‧貝多芬 （Ludwig van Beethoven, 1770-1827)

作家：

• 李奧‧尼可雷雅迷課‧托司托依（Leo Nikolayevich Tolstoy, 1828-1910)

• 維吉尼亞‧渥夫 （ Virginia Woolf, 1882-1941)

• 歐尼斯特‧海明威（Ernest Hemingway, 1899-1961)

• 茶裡思‧ 狄更斯（Charles Dickens, 1812-1870）

Reverse translation:

• 食穀慢 －＞ Eating rice slow
  

• 茶裡思－＞Thinking in tea

Other versions:

• 渥夫 Wolf －> 夫 ( A man and/or husband.)

• 沃芙 or 歐芙 or 吳爾芙 (Virginia is not a man and/or husband.)
  

*Source: An unnamed Hong Kong website 香港某不點名網站

不錯翻譯 Google Sings!

Google Sings!

Google announced their official Chinese corporate name:

谷 歌 原 來 是 穀 歌

谷是穀的簡體

啊！滿坑滿谷都是穀

The Song of Harvest in the Valley

以前古狗沽狗亂叫一通，

現在狗狗要開始唱山谷豐收之歌，

以後就來好好聽了。

Θ ΘΘ ΘΘ ΘΘ Θ Θ Θ Θ Θ Θ Θ Θ Θ Θ Θ

Love is blind...and mute...and dumb

Falling in love sounds like a good thing, if you can handle the negative cash flow and the raging hormone.

In most cases, 'falling' is the most descriptive word for this self-inflicted human condition. Falling in love not only makes people fall out of any good sense, in my limited sampling, people who claimed to be falling in love…., well, their IQ points immediately dropped 50%. Falling in love make the people in the passion of it blind, mute and dumb.

Don’t believe me? Show me a couple crazy in love that will buy an insurance policy to compensate themselves in case their ‘undying’ love for each other meets its eventual, fatal reality check. Falling in love soon turns into failing in love, and ends with fighting in hate. Yes, yes, there are enduring examples of falling in love, but I can count them with my fingers.

Falling in love, may just be the biggest trick that has been played on the human specie to ensure the survival of our human kind.

Wear cowboy well

Long live the long-lived cowboy!
=============================
Papa Jack, 105 years young, my new role model.

Visit his mountain ranch.

錯趣橫生的翻譯

American Idol 美國佬愛抖

昨晚友人來急電，要我看 TV 美國佬愛抖，進行最後淘汰了，我這朋友緊張得聲音一直發抖，聽說我不看這節目很久了，他差點厥了過去。

我很友情贊助立刻轉電視台看，一眼望去，立刻告訴我這愛抖迷，那個福相的非洲女王一定出局，這是以外表為主的流行節目，她能拖撐那麼久已經是奇蹟了。朋友說，絕不可能，她唱得多棒多棒云云。

看吧！宣佈結果後，台上台下除了塞悶先生以外，眾人一片哀戚。電話那頭更傳來一陣哀號，都是你害的啦，朋友似乎想從電話中跳出來掐我脖子。

愛抖這個節目每一季開始都會先播出一些被淘汰的參賽者，只有那幾集很娛樂，我可以大方去嘲笑那些不自量力的參賽者，每回都看得笑得頭疼下巴酸痛胃抽筋， ha ha ha 狂笑停不了，在地上亂滾亂爬。

這個愛抖節目收視率一直很巔峰抖，所以抖上冠軍的參賽者成明星的也不在話下。也有沒抖到前幾名，卻照樣抖紅的，就像咱龍的傳人孔啥祥，一句我盡力了，居然紅遍兩大洲跨太平洋去了。可惜現在他不知發抖到哪兒去，很久沒見到這威廉小子了，還有點想念他的憨傻認真樣呢。

不辣閣新增店面

不 辣 閣 新 增 店 面

文 字 細 思 量 ※ 書 中 日 月 長 II

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Welcome to the store addition.

If you see a blank web page,

please change encoding to Unicode (UTF-8).

Pixar 中 譯 名

皮 克 斯（Pixar）動 畫 工 作 室

Pixar 譯『皮克斯』? What happened to 'ar' ?

In the arms of love 愛入心懷

Thrilled to see Jill.

Sweet home at last.

An angry man 憤怒啥？

What's eating you? Oil?

Give us rice please. 請給米來

Just not enough RICE to go around....

(Rice along does not solve the problems.)

Haunting voices echo on 魂聲盡回音

Never forget the horror.
.

Remember their existence, not their departure.